4/1/08

Just recently I read a phrase that I fell in love with, Grace sufficient to each moment. I have found the feeling of graceful moments to be comfortably true, but I wonder if many young people could grasp this notion, or if it takes a life full of experiences to understand. For many decisions and ideas, it probably does. We learn by making mistakes and then reassessing our choices. Life seems to consist of a constant string of confrontations that need us to make decisions.

None of us are here to squander our lives without learning something. We are in a growth medium, a type of kindergarten, a school room where we learn how to maneuver through life to become the best people we can. Eventually we will leave and take with us a soul full of what we have learned.

Ah, leave to go where? Most of us already know. I love the statement by Father John Corapi who said, “There are only winners and losers.”

Ah, how I wish I could help spread his phrase to people who don’t understand Jesus or heaven. But strangely enough, because Jesus loves us so dearly, he will save even the most depraved sinner if they ask it. This is amazing; only such a supreme lover could embrace certain people. Think of the ax murder, fascist dictator or drug pusher. How could Jesus embrace such a person? It may be that such a person has gone so far down the wrong road that he or she doesn’t think to ask Jesus’ forgiveness, even at the last minute. Ah, this is where danger lies in making too many wrong choices or waiting too long before you find and love Jesus. Accidents happen and before you know it, that last moment is already gone.

Most of us know this and prepare ourselves. It is up to us mature adults to pray for and send God’s light to those too ignorant, too busy, too hungry, too greedy, or too happy to learn how to revel in the grace of the moment. The trouble is that on earth, at any one time, at least half of the population are always children, children who must stumble and fall as they learn. One thing is sure, heaven has its hands full as it tries to teach each new generation on earth the grand ideas we were to impertinent to learn from the last generation. One day, with Jesus help, we may pull it all together.

4/2/08

I wonder how many millions of people watched the news flash of what China is doing to its people as it prepares for the Olympic Games. I watched an old man sob while sitting in a wheel chair. His family stood around him also crying because their home of 70 years had been destroyed. His apartment stood in the area needed for the games, as did thousands of other people's homes. China just bulldozes the houses down? This for a few games?

This behavior by the Chinese government epitomizes what leaders can do in a culture that is saturated in modernity without the break wall of religion or a belief in God. It is materialism run riot, a materialism that races down the road so fast it mangles anyone in its path, a materialism that turns people of good character into beggars.

So far America tends still to listen to the majority of people, but what would happen if the majority of people decide that the drive towards material goods is more important than good sense, moral values, or spirituality?

It has already happened. Look at welfare. It was put into our heads that people on welfare were all cheaters. Now welfare has been cut so drastically that people have no where to turn even if they can't find work. The same is true of street beggars. "Oh, they make thousands of dollars begging," Or "They make more than I do," is a common refrain. But would you beg on a street if you didn't need to?

We can protect ourselves and our country by living simply. The phrase I quoted came from this paragraph:

"When a culture is saturated with market driven values there are steps we can take to lessen the distraction. For Christians, Larry Rasmussen suggests the virtues of sustainability.”

Live simply

Don’t consume more than we need

Give up the need to be ‘number one’

Recognize that when life is lived simply and deeply, there is a grace sufficient to each moment.

[Quote taken from Crosscurrents magazine, “Mei’s Invitation” by Jay McDaniel. Winter 2008, p 528.]

Well, I write this but should look to my own faults first. The reason I keep writing so often about the need for empathy in our culture is that I am worried about America. It seems to me that we have a growing infection, like an autoimmune infection that is eating into our common sense and morals. The infection cuts away at our humanity, thought by rational thought.

I am actually writing this out of a sense of guilt. I haven't been praying as much as I used to do. I take that back, I pray every day, but I haven't been sending out my thoughts to people as much I should.

I asked Jesus, "Have I lost my empathy?"

He smiled and I knew I hadn't, not yet. What does worry me is that I might if I keep forgetting to send out loving thoughts to individual people. I thought of this when I saw the poor old man in China crying. He'd been displaced from his home because of the Olympic games. My heart went out to him. My own plight is similar, but not as hopeless.

Jesus explained to me once that I need keep my ability to feel empathy active.

"Go to crying babies or others in need at least once a month." He told me.

Did it take a news program to jolt me back to reality? I also feel guilty because my talks with Jesus have been short and infrequent lately. With my life in extra turmoil, have I neglected my soul?

Never. I will settle down again soon. My prayers haven't stopped. I joke that I no longer need to wiggle out of the day time enough to sit down to pray the rosary; now I sit during long commutes to work and back. Plenty of time to pray, and what better place then driving on our crawling speed-ways?

4/4/08

Well, I just got done praying and talking to Jesus and others. It isn’t a specific area or node that has the power, it is us. Our prayers are bringing more light to the world.

One person I met while walking in the light this morning said to me, “We thank you for showing us how to send out the light.”

I smiled because it is true, just as Jesus showed me the way. Just as Jesus told us long ago to show our light. People are glowing and spreading their glow, like street lamps turning on to light up a whole city. Everyone who reflects the light from God, glows onto other people and they glow and send out the light too.

What a wonderful revelation and it was all begun by Jesus for our benefit. Jesus is leading us to where we need to be now and in the future.

I feel so much better after meditating and praying the rosary this morning. I had so many ideas rolling around and decisions to make it was effecting me adversely. Yet, all it took was basking in God’s light of liquid gold for me feel connected again. The short walk with Jesus and other people around the earth who spread the light put my sense of perspective back in place. I recommend a walk with Jesus for everyone.

4/5/08

As soon as I met Jesus on the mountain, he motioned to me.

“Come meet your friends.” He said and took me by the hand.

We walked around trees and boulders until we came to the large opening on the side of the mountain. There we walked up to a person wearing a type of clothing I am not familiar with who bowed their head in greeting. Then we walked further and a person wearing a white gown embraced me. Many of the people I met wore red or different colors as they greeted me with a nod or shook my hand. I hadn’t realized before how we each choose to wear the garment that symbolizes our belief in heaven. I choose to wear white because of my religion and culture. Other people choose to wear different styles and colors.

After greeting a few of the people, there were thousands standing on the mountain by now, we gathered into a circle and began to send out light from each of our centers of being. Within seconds, the energy grew into a golden glow of liquid light that flowed over us and felt almost overpowering in strength. We basked in God’s golden glory, then carried this living, vital energy with us to spread it out in our respective nations.

A group of us went to Detroit and smothered it in a haze of light energy. As I stood in my old home, I imagined myself as a pebble dropping into a pond. I could see rolls of light energy traveling outward in vaporous rings that covered the whole city. The light energy flowed through houses and over streets and into a million hearts and souls. It flowed beyond the boarders of one city and reached into the whole metro area, the whole state of Michigan. People in other states were doing likewise.

I speculate that the spread so much of God's energy, built upon love, honesty, and all things good smoothes us out, but makes the bad ones so bumpy they stick out like dark tangles upon the fabric of life. Perhaps more people are getting caught with their hands in the cookie jar these days? I am not sure, but it seems to be true.

After we had meditated or prayed for about a half hour, we gathered together again, not on the mountain this time, but at the huge, boulder in the sky. That huge monolith that would block out the golden rays of God's vitality from our souls. Thousands of us shoved and pushed until we heard stone rumble against stone. As it moved, a billion hidden doors opened up around the earth, as if one push controlled them all. We then watched as wave upon golden wave covered all the earth. Heads turned to look up and whales jumped from the sea in gladness. We reached down to people who seemed to notice what was going on and asked them to help us spread the light. Many more joined us.

I feel rushed this morning because our annual Legion of Mary mass is this morning, but I am so glad I took the time to meet with Jesus. Although, I join in sending good will and God's energy to as many as I can, I am the one who derives the most benefit from this meditation. My soul expands with pleasure, worries bead up and slouch off, mental kinks melt to butter, and all is well with the world once again. The sun is shinning brightly and we will have a beautiful spring day, the kind of day that makes us thankful to be alive. I thank you God.

4/8/08

I have been reading The Virtue Driven Live by Fr. Benedict J. Groeschel. I admire the keen answers he gives to people during his live television program on EWTN, so when I found his book in my son’s bookcase, I borrowed it. One subject he mentions in his book that struck me as vitally important is the difference between mere religiosity and real faith. Faith is feeling a reverence towards God. When people complain and say they don't get anything out of going to church. He answers that getting something for yourself is secondary. "We go to church—to mass—to worship and give reverence to God, to give thanks for sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch, life, time and a host of other blessings." (Page 57)

Our purpose in worship is to thank God for all he has given us. Our very existence depends on God’s generosity every second of our day. I wasn’t sure about the difference between religiosity and faith either until I read his book. When I would hear complaints that church goers can be hypocrites, I didn't know how to answer. After reading his definition of faith, I understand better what is going on. Faith comes from the heart, religiosity comes from culture. It is natural for us humans to be drawn to religion because it is part of our system of behavior, but some people just go through the motions.

I understand because I have been there. I have sat in church and mumbled the prayers without thinking on them deeply. I have let my mind ramble through my problems and settle on just about everything except what I should have been doing during mass. I am as wayward as the next person, or used to be.

No longer. Jesus has given me such a infusion of understanding about God that I humbly thank God every day of my life for everything. I thank God if I am lucky enough to take a hot shower, eat a pleasant meal, have a good drive, or if my family is reasonably well. God has shown me his immensity, God has spoken to me, God has lead me to where I am now. I have no complaints. I feel awed and bowed by God’s greatness. Yes, now I thank him every day, especially during the Catholic mass.

I don’t mean that my mind doesn’t ever wonder during mass, no, I am not that holy. I do always try to remember why I come to mass in the first place, to give reverence to God, to thank Jesus for the sacrifice and hope he gave us, and to thank Mary, the Queen Mother of Heaven for her willingness to bare the most important person ever born to mankind. If any of us can feel these things and speak them in our hearts for the few moments it takes, then, when our mind wanders to personal debts, sickness, or a wayward child, we will be excused. We are only human, after all. So be human, but first give respect, honor and devotion to your God.

4/10/08

I watched a history program on television where many different people, the Maya, specifically, predicted the end of the world, December 2012. When I asked Jesus about this, he told me the date was not accurate. We may face a huge disaster of some kind around or near that time period, but not the end of the world. I suspect that there are a number of reasons why this date is wrong. The main one is that our prayers have delayed and forestalled such a dire event. The next reason is that our own calendar is off the mark for matching exact dates from the past. I don't know any more than this, but it seems enough to accept that the worst isn't as close as we might think.

4/14/08

Could anyone have imagined that we will have two of the greatest and holy of men on American soil at the same time. Their light is so strong that it precedes them to our shores. The visits of Pope Benedict and the Dali Lama will be overlapping for a short time. How wonderful for our nation.

Few people will actually see the light they give off, and even fewer will notice the souls that heal because of their presence, but most of us will realize that their visit is a great honor. Already many Catholics are gathering to receive the Pope, who we will learn to know better after this visit. I am sure knowing this puts a great burden on our Pope but he can handle it because he was chosen by Jesus Christ to lead the church. Also, the Dali Lama has thousands of followers who will listen to his talks and meet with him. I believe that America needs the enlightening effect of their presence at this time. We thank you for your visits.

I haven’t been writing as much as I used to for a number of reasons, all of them minor. When I meditated this morning God seemed to reach down and empower me with great light, a light that I spread to every person I know. I sent light to every one in my family, and then I centered the light on the city of Detroit and Michigan. Jesus has told me that he is speaking to many people in today’s world, so I know that many more people are praying and sending out the light all the time, and if I fall by the wayside for a few short days, it is hardly noticeable.

I feel back to normal today. Sunshine always helps, doesn’t it. A beautiful day can liven up our heart. To me the sunshine is a symbol for God’s light, and in truth, it is a form of God’s light made visible for us. A reminder of where each seed, egg, and every indrawn breath that fills our lungs comes from. Thank you God.

4/12/08

I realize now how much our own peace of mind determines our ability to meet and gather together on the mountain. Saturday morning I kept getting very distracted because I kept thinking about my own problems. Too many rejections, too many attempts to find a place to live with little money, too many disappointments and it all rolled over me this morning. Yesterday when I met with Jesus I felt ok because I had great hope. This morning I felt lost and hopeless.

I can’t help comparing my own hopeless feeling with the people being displaced in China because of the Olympic games, the people displaced from Katrina, or the people who loose their homes from fire or tornados, though maybe insurance covers their loss. For many people, especially refugees displaced by war, there is little hope of recovery. I am beginning to wonder if my own situation is hopeless as well. Surly not?

All this being said, I still feel hope because Jesus has not abandoned me. He promised me once that I would never experience a “Dark night of the soul.” I think this morning I was close to it. When I first reached out for Jesus I felt lost, but then found him again. In the darkness without Jesus light, I wondered if my job was done here on earth, perhaps I am no longer needed. Well, that was the state of my mind this morning and it was exceedingly hard to climb up and out of the depths.

Jesus has assured me I will be fine. Truly, I will be, yet, I am not sure I have recovered my enthusiasm completely, doubts linger. But isn't this normal for us humans? Such is life. Next week will prove better, and the next and next. I have about thirty more years to live. Surly, I will find a place in which to live out those years.

Jesus said to me not too long ago, "You have just begun to live."

I intend to think on his words and leave the worries for night dreams.

4/16/08

As I drove by the house on Farnsworth yesterday I noticed a tall blond person using a tripod stand to photograph and survey the land east of Moran Street. This is where the house exploded and my broken house still stands, (minus my storage shed and privacy fence that has been stolen ) as I try to decide whether to move back or not. Every time I go over there, something new is missing. I am so tired of it all. Most especially I wonder why the person was surveying the land. Isn't it usual for a company or city to survey a parcel of land when they want to build something upon it?

It is strange to think that anyone would want that specific group of city lots to build upon, especially since there must be thousands more just like it around the city. The absurd notion just popped into my mind that maybe I was bombed out because someone wanted the land my home stands on. Bizarre idea, of course. Absurd.

Yet, I remember at statement Jesus said to me a few years ago.

"You are sitting on the mother lode."

I never did learn what he meant exactly, and can't figure it out on my own, so I guess I will never know. As he as repeated to me often, he cannot tell me certain information because it could effect our future.

4/19/08

I realized a new truth while I meditated this morning with the group who meets on the mountain. I remember Jesus telling me often, “You need to do it yourselves,” and I always wondered why. Surly God and all of heaven cares about us, surly they do what they can to save us, surly they are powerful, so why must we put out so much effort. If we take this thought to its logical conclusion we get a glimmer of the truth. I mean, why pray at all? Why not let heaven will do it for us?

We know there is something wrong with that statement. Admittedly, we need and expect grace from God, but we also realize we need to put out effort of our own. This morning while I meditated and walked in spirit to spread God’s golden light all over the land, Jesus spoke to me.

He said, “The reason you and the other people need to do it for yourself is because you exist in “Now Time.”

There must be something about our mind’s capability of existing in the present “now” that increases our effectiveness and power. Of course, our earth and the social milieu in which we exist in is also in “now time.” Strangely, even as I type each word or letter it moves from the now into the past. I suspect that Jesus exists in all time, but that we have the unique ability to exploit time as it exists in the here and now.

Well, the true nature of time is complex and unfathomable. Even our own minds have the ability to slow it down or speed it up. It is too much for me. Yet, I understood the implication of Jesus words as soon as he spoke them. I could feel their truth.

I smile because every once in a while Jesus throws out these tid-bits of truth. He knows how I love it. I should sing the children’s song, “What a friend I have in Jesus,” all the time.

One more thing: I believe that one of the reasons for my existence, perhaps the most important work for heaven, was to write the book, The Only Way. It is a work of fiction but it captures a lot of true ideas, even from our future. It serves as a warning. Assuming no publisher would touch it, I published it myself on the web. Please read it if you get a chance.

4/23/08

I read what I wrote recently about Jesus statement to me about sitting on the mother lode. It wasn't a statement so much as a quip, perhaps a bit of irony. Even so, I still don't know what he meant, but can speculate. What if the houses in this neighborhood are sitting on top of a large oil field? Then would we all become Beverly Hillbillies? Now that would be a real irony.

Well, it no longer matters to me. I just learned that for me to move back in the plumbing would need to be redone for the whole house, and along with the other repairs, I just can’t do it. I have no home to call my own at this time.

4/23/08

I felt great pride in our Pope last week, and this made me feel doubly proud to be a Catholic. I loved his theme: Christ our hope. I believe in this theme too. I listened with delight as our Pope spoke to the young people and implored all of them to become friends with Jesus. Friendship with everyone is what Jesus truly wants. In this way, he can more easily lead us out of the morass in which we have fallen. Jesus would help us humans step up higher than we have ever stepped before. We would learn to use our faith to accomplish amazing feats. He has promised these things to us, and what Jesus promises, he gives.

While I watched Pope Benedict instruct us, deliver speeches, say mass, greet people, and pray for all of us, I couldn't help wonder at the energy that kept him going. I wonder, will I be able to function so aptly at the age of 81? Yes, with Jesus at my side I too might be as able. It was Jesus who helped him stand up to the riggers of each long ceremony and talk. I truly hope our Pope took a long rest when he got home. He certainly deserves it.

I felt truly inspired to do more to acquaint people with Jesus after the Pope's visit. I wonder how many other people felt the same way? Surly, a large number, because I think Pope Benedict conquered the hearts of America.

I just read that China is willing to go back into talks concerning Tibet. I hope the talks are eventually fruitful. I now know first hand what it means to be displaced from your home. The Dalai Lama seems to have held up well all these years, considering and never lost his vision. I will try to keep his fortitude in mind during my own trial.

4/26/08

This morning as I met with Jesus on the mountain, I looked around at the beautiful sky, trees, and rocks, and realized once again the magnificence of our earth.

Jesus spoke at this moment. He said, “We are hoping to keep it that way.”

I nodded my understanding. Much of what Jesus and I talk about revolves around the current crises we are facing about global warming. The angels are working to encourage many people to do something constructive to alleviate the danger. Earth will certainly survive but can we?

There are so many people facing agony now, I shudder to imagine what worse might happen as the weather turns against us. Bad enough we turn against ourselves. Most of the problems so far has been of our own invention: cultural conflict and war, few of which will be important enough to matter a hundred years from now. Will the weather and death of millions matter?

As I walked down the mountain with Jesus, I once more noticed the diverse clothing of the people gathered. Many wore maroon and yellow, many more wore white. One man stayed on his knees as I greeted him, and explained this was how he liked to pray. I understood. Some of us develop our own method of prayer and meditation. I know I had to because I didn’t know any other way.

Something else I realized at this moment was that all of us who meet here are saints: Each of us has one foot on earth and the other in heaven. This is wonderful and it is Jesus hope that our group will continue to multiply. We come here because Jesus is calling us forward. I think it may also be true that Buddhist and Christians will join ranks one day, but that is for the far future. Now it is enough that many of diverse beliefs can meet here on the mountain as one mind turned to God.

Well enough of my wandering thoughts. This morning as I went into Africa and imagined a large shipment of grain arriving, God said, “I will make it so.”

Encouraged, I set about going around the world doing the same thing. It has been a while since I have thought so deeply of other people’s plight because I have been wrapped up in so many of my own.

“Enough!” I shouted to myself. Get back to work, the work God wants me to do. So I went to an orphanage just as a stocks of food was being delivered, in another home for children, they found cans of food in a out of the way cupboard, a well I went to filled up with water because it wasn’t depleted after all, relief workers found extra bags of grain in a warehouse.

In America, as staff opened up cupboards in a few soup kitchens, they found extra food to cook. A surprising truck load of extra food showed up a one door. With God so evident, I also tried to imagine jobs for people out of work. I found this almost impossible for me to do, even though jobs are so vital for some areas. Not sure why.

In all, as I walked in the light, I got the impression that God was giving me a sample. That God wants us to take the first step to make change happen, then he will take over to insure that it does happen. My delight was unbounded as I watched the huge bags of grain arrive at a refuge camp. God can make an event occur in an instant with a thought: lead into gold, inert energy into God’s energy.

This morning was a rare event. It isn’t every meditation that holds such wonders. This morning I felt refreshed and filled with God. My ability to send out the light seemed to increase ten fold. Once more in my life, God stepped in to assure me that I was on the right track, that he held me to him in love, that I had just had a short set-back and hadn’t lost it.

4/27/08

If challenges help us grow, I should be on my way to becoming a giant. If I ever get the chance to paint again, my art should have improved greatly from the life damages I have recently lived through. The destruction of my home is the major cause of recent distress, but my own attempts to fix it and my failures will no doubt all add in. No doubt this will also improve my art? Poetry too? I should begin writing poetry once more and also continue with the book I started more than two years ago now. Actually, if the recent upsets do nothing else but throw me back into the groove of keeping busy again, I may get merit from it. Only time will tell.

Already, I have promised Jesus to begin traveling with him again. I made the promise before but kept forgetting. I have a lot of extra time on my hands now, so no more excuses. I intend to plough through this disaster and use its lesson to become a better person, maybe even a better artist if I ever get a place to paint again.

4/27/08

This evening I met with Jesus and we went back to Cotton World. I used to visit often, but haven’t for many years. What is wrong with me? Well, forget what was wrong, just make it right. We went back tonight and I asked Jesus if we could follow the same path that we walked the first time I went to Cotton World. I hoped to revive my first impressions.

We arrived and walked across a field fluffy with white, dry snow. Not really snow as I later learned, but a form of plant protein fallen from the trees, a form of plant matter that the people learned to use to make everything they need. We walked knee deep through mounds of the light fluffy stuff, and even chest high in one spot between two low hills. Our goal in the far distance was barely discernable through the haze of falling cotton. But as we walked closer, the short squat tree became less fuzzy.

I remember the first time I saw it, this beautiful, wonderful tree of fairy tale proportion. A bloated, portly tree trunk three times the size of any tree I ever saw on earth with huge branches reaching out sideways before turning upwards. An leprechaun or pixie tree like in story books.

We walked up to it and knocked on the wood’s smooth surface. The door opened right away and Aaron, who stands almost as short as me, smiled and gave me a huge bear hug of welcome. He asked where I’d been but didn’t give us time to answer because he joyfully kept talking. He was happy to see us.

He explained that the wife was away right then with a few of their grandchildren. He told us that the telling time was just about to begin. His words helped me remember the loved and greatly treasured tree-knot that grew into a seat in the main room, polished from a thousand nights of family members sitting atop and telling tales. What a delightful way to spend some evening time. I asked if I could touch it before they began. The dark wooden color and smoothness made it look like polished chestnut but it felt like soft leather. Truly beautiful. The rest of the tree wood where they made their home wasn’t so dark as this.

As a family member began to tell a remembered tale, I lost track because of the many names that were unknown to me. instead I mentioned to Jesus silently that I remembered this and the factory like chemistry tables beneath. So much was coming back I felt pleased and worried that I had stayed away so long.

Why did I? I asked Jesus, but he didn’t answer. Maybe there is no answer or maybe I thought I had already seen it all, so why go back?

Well, this isn’t true, I haven’t seen it all. The universe is so vast no one could see it all. Besides Jesus explained to me that he wanted us to re-visit some of the worlds we had visited before.

He added, “It is necessary.”

Yet he didn’t tell me why he thought it was necessary. Well, it isn’t for me to ask too deeply. It felt good just to stand next to Jesus on another world again, and to visit with warm friends. I remembered my first visit gave me the feeling of a warm, childhood, Christmas. This time it felt more realistic, but just as warm. Aaron told me I would tell a tale one of these days on the stool. I actually blushed at the invitation, but couldn’t imagine anything I could tell that would be interesting to these people.

Later, I mentioned in conversation the recent problems on earth, Aaron led us to a room that I hadn’t seen before. He reminded me of the rocket ship they have stored away for infrequent use and how his people had helped earth once or twice in our past. I nodded remembering that only a few years ago Aaron had filled my blood with antidotes to many viruses that might be used against us by terrorists. Aaron’s people are considered to be the best chemists in this area of the universe.

Aaron led us to a small room and explained that he already knew about the problems earth was having. He showed us a wall of televisions, they didn’t look like earth televisions but the view on the screens was familiar. The screens were broadcasting news shows from different nations on earth. A number of people made it their job to keep up with the news on earth.

“In a way,” he said to me, “We are a sister planet, even though we are more highly evolved than earth.”

Now I remembered that too, that in moral standing, Cotton World was mid-way between a blissful, God filled world and earth. This world isn’t perfect, but they don’t have war or other strife like we do on earth. So I assumed that Aaron meant sister in a different sense than twin, he meant sister as in care and concern. The people of Cotton World think of us as family. Even so, they can’t interfere with out politics or culture, but they may find a way to help us in the future.

Jesus nodded at this. Perhaps that is one of the reasons we came for a visit. To reacquaint myself and those who read what I write with a family of planets we should all meet one day.