12/1/10
If men, women and children started freezing and dropping on the street from starvation whose responsibility is that? Whose fault? The man and women because they didn’t look hard enough for work? The government because it didn’t provide a culture of work? Wall street who grabs up all the money and resources? Corporate leaders who think only of profit? Churches who don’t do enough for their people? Families that have broken down? Drugs?
Who could we blame for such a crisis? Or is it a crisis? Should we think of it as the ‘way of nature’ or culling the heard, or survival of the fittest? Are people like the over populated deer herd that needs to be killed off? Are we all mere animals that we should let nature takes it course? Harsh thoughts for an enlightened people? Except that we are not very enlightened are we? If we were, it would be the responsibility of all to work towards the well being of all. Political representatives would get paid according to the wealth of their constituents, not make more than an average person makes in a lifetime. Work would be available for all those who wanted and needed it. Food would be abundant and shelter from the elements always available. What a wonder-world that would be.
If we truly believed that every person had a soul and was worthy of love it would happen. Not everyone seems lovable, which is their right, but wouldn’t a more rounded out education in spirituality as well as general learning even out those wild bumps? Wouldn’t having enough necessities raise people differently? Of course it would, and it will on a future world, hopefully this earth.
Poverty breeds crime and discord. Everyone knows this. In fact, we are witnessing this fact right now. Shootings and murders and robberies are moving into the suburbs where some people are just now learning they can’t stand going without the toys of the modern world. Where jobs disappear, crime rises. Eventually there is a breakdown in civility--a notable fact, so why can't we do more about it?
Well, we could build better walls but…
Walls are not a solution. Jesus took me to a few disaster worlds once where had built great walls or people were separated by false ideas. Some of those worlds died out. Worse, on a few worlds, people wanted to die, but couldn’t. I asked Jesus not to take me to any more disaster worlds, they are too hurtful. Certainly, I don't want earth to become one of those disaster worlds.
So what to
do? A number of billionaires are giving away half their money and they are to
be commended, but sorry to say, it seems a mere drop in the bucket and the
inner conflict that plagues our government stops them acting for the good of
the people. But what if people really do begin to lay frozen on the sidewalk?
It happened in
All this writing of what should be and who will read it? I don’t know, but I feel a great relief that I can spout and shake my fists in the air on the internet
I smile at myself. Things should change, will change for humans in a far off future, either here or on the new world, but it is easy to forget the forces all around us that block such change. This is why I pray the rosary and meditate. Prayers, especially the rosary, can keep the area around our personal space clean of smog. A rosary in the home purifies the air, blows away the dark that would cover the earth like a blanket except for Jesus and his angels and the people who love and hope and keep on pushing.
I usually don't read about what should be because it is too disappointing to watch reforms fail. But, Jesus tells me there is hope, so I must believe it too. Like most of us, I learned the hard way and maybe all of us that comprise our civilization must learn the hard way too. So we grit our teeth and continue on.
12/1/10
I wanted to specifically pray for a young man I know who needs help this morning, so I turned on the rosary and relaxed as I began praying with the sisters. Totally relaxed, I lifted up my arms to God like we do in church on Sunday and God’s light began pouring into me like a fountain of liquid gold. God was the high pivot point of a triangle and I the bottom point of an upside-down one. I could hardly contain the energy that poured into me, so much that I knew I had to share it with someone.
“That is the point,” Jesus suddenly said to me.
I smiled at the truth of it as I went to the young man and began to share the light-energy with him. At one point I gave him a deep and lasting hug. Jesus assured me that he could not see me else I would have been too embarrassed to hug this almost stranger so tenderly. I felt as if I were feeding his soul and that he would soon turn to God and heaven. Then I sent some of the energy to family and friends and around the neighborhood. Even after sending God energy around I still felt abundantly full. This golden substance from God is a fountain of never ending and eternal joy and peace.
12/3/10
I watched a
disk sent to me about Clear Creek Abby in
My mind can be steady while meditating, but I fall far short of real concentration. Perhaps because I am out and about in a busy world most of the time. Perhaps these distractions are the reason Jesus steps close in every once in a while to give me a gift. Gifts such as: Jesus will stand next to me almost as physical person, speak in a real voice, show me light pouring out from a communion host, take me on a special trip in heaven, or like the other day, give me such a mystical experience of light during prayer that I remember it fully for a long time. Jesus tells me he will give me a gift on my birthday that is coming up Dec 9 too. I remember one birthday he took me to a place in the universe that I had already painted to amaze and amuse me.
I tend towards the mystical and Jesus reinforces this in me because he wants me to keep it up, keep up the writing. He also told me that my worldliness is ok too, that I have achieved a good balance between the two. I am glad he approves and happy that I am doing as heaven dictates. What else is life about if it isn’t love of God and learning and teaching?
12/4/10
Each time I watch the movie The Truman Show, I feel like I am being put through a ringer and squeezed dry. I used to think the movie reflected my own life, but now I know different. Now I think it pertains to everyone where the only ones to walk free are those who travel with Jesus. We are the end of the movie, the ones walking through the door away from darkness. One day this will be true for many and we will escape the chains, that blinding dark that holds us bound.
12/8/10
Today, I went to mass in celebration of the Immaculate Conception of Mary. Mass was held in the parlor instead of the church which made mass smaller but more intimate. I sat in the first row and was glad I did because at one point in the mass, Jesus stood then stepped away from the alter and leaned towards me.
At the moment when the servers said “This is my blood which will be shed for you,” I gasped because Jesus stood at the altar next to Father Thomas and the servers saying the mass. I watched as he stepped away, bent towards me and made as if to hand me a communion wafer. This lasted only a few short seconds and then Jesus became a blur that disappeared. Soon after, as I walked up to get a communion wafer, I wondered what Jesus meant for me to understand. What was he trying to teach us.
I think he meant for me to notice that he is always the one saying the mass, that he is always present and that no matter how tarnished or lacking we are, he stands among us and personally participates in each and every mass.
Actually, Father Thomas spoke on a similar theme in his sermon by telling us that Jesus is always for us and with us no matter what we did in the past. We are all worthy of Jesus love.
As I drove to get gas after church and to the store the image of Jesus stepping towards me stayed vividly in my mind. I was delighted that he bothered and I blurted out, “How do you do that?” A silly question. Not worth an answer and I didn't get one. More to the point, I should have asked, “Why did only I see you?” I didn’t not get an answer for this question either. I think I was born to see and report about Jesus, abet after ¾ of my life has already been spent doing nonsense things. Jesus often steps in to give me a surprise. He told me he would give me one on my birthday. This one was a day early, but who knows, maybe I was born near midnight or something. Regardless, I am grateful for his presence. I believe that many people feel Jesus near them but few see him, and I can't explain why.
12/9/10
I am so
proud of and delighted with Father Thomas's sermons and celebration of the mass
that I invited my family to come to church. I have invited them often, with no
result, but this time, I said it would be my birthday present. Now some of my
family have agreed to come to
12/11/10
As I drove
down
As I looked at the burnt house roll by beneath a deep blue sky, I wondered what will become of this city and its people. Shift people around and downsize seems to be the latest word from the top. I intend to stand by anyone who gets shoved out of their home if they want to stay. Our government, national and local, has done enough harm. Wouldn’t it be nice if they’d contribute to the solution?
Is
downsizing going to work? Does anyone want to be forced to live in a crowded
area? I prefer country and some parts are almost there. How do rural
communities make it? Why can’t
As usual, the biggest issue is
Money. Here is an idea of something that would build the city up instead of
tear it down, that is if we had money. Turn a few empty blocks into a living
museum, a place where people can visit to see what life was like in the 40's
and 50's in
Well, I am a thinker, not a doer;
so if the idea has any validity, someone else will need to wave the banner. I
believe it is going to happen, the question is—happen sooner or later. The city
of
I may write to a few members in our city council about the idea. Can't hurt and it just may help, since everyone is driving towards change right now, this may be the time to throw the idea into the ring.
12/13/10
My family,
or a large part of it, did come to church Sunday and I beamed with pride during
the whole mass. Everything was perfect, extra perfect because it was the Sunday
for the children’s choir to sing too. The little children's solos were
delightful and my family was greatly pleased with the children and the whole
mass.
As we sat in Louie's for breakfast, I brought up the subject of Father Thomas’s sermon and said that I felt he was speaking directly to me.
My daughter-in-law said, “No, he was speaking to me.”
My son said, "No, to me."
I laughed because Father’s sermons have that quality, the quality of making everyone believe his sermon is directed at them. This Sunday, I noticed Father hesitate here and there during his sermon, but then he really got rolling. I’ll bet that he never writes down what he is going to say beforehand, but depends on Jesus to inspire him. This has made his sermons very effective. This is what is called the “Gift of Tongues.” This is how the apostles spoke after they were given the holy spirit. When they went out into the crowd, everyone could understand what they told them. This gift of tongues does not consist of gibberish and mumbled words, like some people think. It consists of a message from the speaker, inspired by Jesus, clearly spoken into the mind and ears of other people. It is a gift from Jesus to the person speaking and also the person receiving the message. Miracles truly do happen every day if we stop long enough to take a look.
12/14/10
I was pleased
to read that DTE has sponsored a shelter where up to 72 families can go to get
warm. The article also stated that the
Here are the Christmas Carolers playing and
laughing between songs.
12/21/10
I felt so proud and excited that a group from our neighborhood revived the tradition of going home to home singing Christmas carols that when they came to my house, I ran and grabbed my camera, took two shots, but neglected to turn it on. So I didn’t get a photo, but someone else did and was nice enough to e-mail it to me. I am ashamed that I didn’t have cookies or candy to give the kids. I promise that if they do the same next year I will bake cookies to give them when they come Christmas caroling
12/15/10
This morning before work, I took a meandering walk down many paths in the Cathedral of Light, a garden setting built by the angels, half in their world and half in ours; a place readily called up with a touch of imagination; a garden full of flowers, grass, and trees; a garden of different religious settings; a place for everyone to walk in to visualize and communicate with the holy.
I have described it many times, but I think other people may describe it somewhat differently according to where they choose to walk. This morning I ended my walk on a grassy lane before a huge stand of bright roses where Our Blessed Mother stood in front with a smile. After I thanked her for being there, I called a few souls of people I know up to meet with her so their souls could be healed. Mary is the mother of God and a lover of humanity. She is the healer of souls and many souls in today's world need healing. She is always there for anyone who needs her help. I remember once what Mary said to me regarding people. She explained to me that she would rather heal a sick soul than a sick body. The body will one day die, but a precious and holy soul can go on forever.
12/15/10
Silly of me, but I began crying as I watched Channel 7 news on Wednesday. The news showed letters to Santa. What made me cry was that some of those letters were from parents, parents who said, “I believe in you Santa.” What touched me so deeply is the realization of how young those parents must be and how desperate in these hard times. The news said that even the children’s letters changed this year. Most of the children didn’t ask for toys but clothing for their brothers and sisters or a job for a parent. I know some of the letter writers hoped their letter would get flagged so they could get help; yet, the idea of a young parent, hardly out of the nest, used to better things, calling out to Santa sent tears down my face. I wonder how many more people, lost in their hardship, unknowable and uncared for, are suffering so badly that their only hope left is a letter to Santa Clause. I hope next year they think to send that letter God.
12/16/10
I woke up early in the morning, too early, so I decided to put the rosary on and make some good use of my time. I began to meditate and step out into the stars. Jesus came and took my hand as we went from place to place, finally to stand back on earth near a river running through a canyon. I sat back in the boat and just relaxed as we floated down this meandering river. I could see from above that it was like a ribbon on the land with some steep rock sides and some sides low to the ground.
Jesus spoke as we slowly floated down the river. “There are lazy rivers like this on every earth-like planet of which there are billions. You will find one soon."
He meant our scientists would detect or see another earth like planet soon, and so they have. We got out of the boat on a small sand beach and walked through bushes and rocks and pebbles. I sat on a large rock and watched the water lap against the shore.
“This too,” Jesus said, "The beach, sand and rocks. It is the same everywhere.”
This seems so obvious and makes so much sense, but it isn’t something we humans think about often. Of course, an earth like planet would be like earth with mountains and oceans and rivers and trees. I suppose what makes planets different is the life on them, or maybe the intelligent life? Well, I don’t know really.
“Is every thing the same then?”
“No, certainly not. There are unique spots everywhere. Remember River World?”
“Oh, how could I forget that special place. Yes, it was very unique.”
“Let me show you something.”
Suddenly we stood on a strange beach. I knew this because the color of the sky seemed different, but mostly because of the sand near the water. It was stripped in two different colors. Well, not exactly stripped, more like a wavy pattern of different color.
“How could this happen?” I asked. “How could sand make such a pattern just by being pushed by water. In truth, it looked like precious stones had been crushed into sand, turquoise from some waves and rubies from another separated by normal looking sand crystals? I craved to reach down and touch it, but of course, I couldn't, which is well because I don't think it should ever be touched or smeared. Surly, any people who saw it would know it wasn’t to be disturbed, that it was too beautiful to be touched.
I was reminded of the beautiful sand paintings created by American Indians and Buddhist Monks and how they erase them at the end of the ceremony. Then my mind imagined the billions of planets and how they must vary. I thought about smells. Different worlds would smell different too and suns would glow with different levels of intensity. How exciting it will be for our scientists to view such places with telescopes. I can imagine us sending a telescope to a new found earth to investigate its surface life. Far in the future, but not too far, I think.
12/23/10
I often wonder how far we have to grow up before we can join in the traffic of the universe, which would take a complete turn about in morals and outlook. Yet, if we ever did achieve maturity and perfection think of how nice, but boring, life would be on our world. Maybe God knows what he is doing, never a dull moment on Earth. Actually, there are a few existing worlds where the people are extremely mature and close to perfect. Jesus showed me a few of them once.
When I asked Jesus what goals such a people might have, Jesus said, "You can’t even envision their wants and needs.”
In other words, it is so far beyond my comprehension that I shouldn't try to understand. Although, Jesus did point out to me once that some people on the paradise worlds go about in the universe in an attempt to help people who are still struggling. I get the impression that there are as many cultures on different worlds as there are people on earth. Jesus has told me that the number of peopled worlds in the galaxy is unimaginable, and even still, life is exceptional and precious.
I will never forget that time Jesus took me to Nexus, a place where people from other worlds connected during travel. They didn’t just hop mentally to another place but for some reason, chose to use Nexus as a way station. I wonder now if this was a group of highly evolved people who belonged to a confederation or group of planets. It might be hard to imagine a world that has solved its own problems enough to enter into such a confederation of planets if it wasn't for the Star Trek series.
I wonder what purpose would be served for them to join? Or, did they have a choice? Probably they did. Jesus tells me that war, as we know it, is rare between planets. So there must be other reasons to join such a group. I wonder if gathering of cultural knowledge or a search for the ultimate Source of the universe might drive them. Well, I don’t know. Maybe I will think to ask Jesus, but I doubt it. When I meditate I am usually into other things than asking a specific question. Much of what Jesus tells me seems spontaneous.
12/24/10 
My dog Kali in the snow
It is the
day before Christmas and I got upset when I went upstairs to turn off the radio
I heard a women in
Those of us in the low income bracket use only a small footprint and need not feel too guilty, but many with high income, including our leaders, should feel guilt because they haven't fixed the problem yet. I guess they won't take full notice until so many "State of emergencies" happen that it begins to dig into their own government pocket. I hope it won't be too late.
12/24/10
My life is worthless, I am a total failure, or so I was thinking this morning. I have never made a career for myself, my books don’t sell or even my paintings. I feel I have wasted my whole life. At this point Jesus smiled at me and implied that this all may be true but only as the world measures worth. That heaven uses another measure. True, but at times like this, nothing seems to heal the wounded mind. But during meditation, Jesus did just that. He gave me an early Christmas present. (Actually he gave me a very worthwhile present Christmas morning too, but I chose not to write about it).
As usual I turned on the rosary, but my mind was so full of my own bad self, I hardly heard it. To clear my mind, I needed to imagine the clunks of every day concerns falling from my shoulders like blocks of ice that turned into fluffy snowflakes. When I felt I'd succeeded, I walked with Jesus over hills covered in pristine snow in a beautiful, serene landscape, so high in the mountains that I doubted any human had ever set foot there. Before we went to join the others, Jesus sent a sudden understanding into my mind and heart that astounded and enveloped my mind.
All at once, I understood that I have value, that my value lays in my ordinariness, my lack of success, and my un-saintliness. It is these qualities that give my writing its value. My writing will inspire other people one day, because if someone like me can talk to Jesus, gather mind to mind with others in prayer, and travel in the universe, then so can anyone. I am nothing and I am proof that you don’t need to be anything to do the same.
As common sense as such an idea sounds, it floored me, astounded my psyche at the moment Jesus showed it to me. He has told me before that my writing would be valuable one day, but never in such a bundle of vision and knowledge. This morning Jesus handed me this knowledge, wrapped in mental ribbons, as a precious gift.
Ah, my contentment is complete, and I believe, long lasting. My miss-understanding has turned over into blissful acceptance. I am well and all is right with the world.
I smile as I write these worlds. Just a short while ago I was ranting about how we are destroying our world, (I edited most of my anger out). Well, so be it. What matters today is now and the message from Jesus implies that if an ordinary person can talk and walk and travel with him, so can anyone. I love it. Still, it isn’t an easy walk. Anyone who tries must go through changes and trials then learn to be discerning and to over come fear. But it can be done. And if you want my advise as the first most important step after your promise to love God, learn to use your imagination. Become as children.
12/27/10
I am constantly amazed at this mind God gave us and its ability to do many things at one time. Ultimately, I believe a mature being with this same mind, could encompass the universe with God, still a far too complex idea for me to fully grasp, but the glimmer I see is amazing. For instance, when I meditate with the rosary, I am able to say the words silently and send my mind outwards to speak encouragement to someone or talk with Jesus or meet with others at the gathering. All the while, I am usually saying the words to the rosary. I often loose track but find this no problem as it is easy to jump back in. How many of us let our minds wonder in church or while saying the rosary as a group. Ideally, we are supposed to keep the mysteries in mind. I tried this but found it wasn’t enough to keep my mind occupied. Another instance: As I drive the car, I can say a silent rosary and at the same time, pay attention to other drivers and still think of other things in my life. Truly our minds are always busy, it is up to us to direct them towards good thoughts and ideas.
As I thought of these mental abilities we all have, I also wondered if my own have grown through the years. I am not sure. If someone were to check out my writing archive, they would find I have changed, but not greatly. I remember I used to write about evil more. This was because I had recently been introduced to evil’s horrible vitality and strength through personal attacks. I was forced to witness its real existence as I never had before. I wanted to show this to people but all it did was put my mind under water, and so gradually learned to concentrate my writing on God’s light, not darkness. I came to the realization that we all know it exists already and don’t need an explanation although I like to explore the concept in my fiction novels.
With my mind turned towards the light more often than not, the world has become like newborn to my mind and eyes. I can’t go past a day without being amazed at the substance of a thing, its beauty, its complexity, its interaction in the whole of our world. Everything is connected and joined, and thought we can’t see it, Jesus has woven a net of light from prayer to prayer from person to person who loves him and we are all connected just as the web of life is connected.
Jesus showed me once how the layers lay upon the world in such complex ways that it was mind-boggling. I couldn’t not take it all in, the layers consisted of minds and group connections and cultures and different ways of being which looked like a ball of loose twine all rolled up and tangled together. Too much. Yet, all God’s worlds are composed of these complexities, at least where there is life. When Jesus gave us simple truths he was sifting through all this complexity to the basics, to what we can understand. I am happy to leave it at that. Just take me where I can understand. It is enough to walk the sky tunnel, to gather mind to mind upon God’s mountain, to visit the Cathedral of Light, to live and give and love. Already, just writing this I have gotten beyond myself. I’d better stop now, quiet my thoughts to simple prayer and back to the simple act of being.